The Top of My Mind

I've realized something. In the sixteen short years that this planet as lent me, I am now able to say that I have realized one single, solitary thing. In the sixteen long years that this planet has lent me, I've made countless observations on the way people work. I've noticed that most people can drift through life without realizing anything. It's quite the shame actually. People spend countless ticks of the hearts wrapped up in oblivious drama that they refuse, or simply cannot take the time to realize that their lives are slipping slowly away. It could be true that that's the one thing that I've realized; that people are too self absorbed to realize things for themselves. Luckily enough for me, I know it's not my realization. If that were the case, then I would obviously be the lonliest person on the face of the earth -- simply because I'd have realized what the masses have failed see. And since, therefore, the masses aren't myself, I would be alone to wallow in my realization. But have little time for fear. Since the entire world has caught the epidemic of self-interest, I've had time to make new friends, broaden my horizons, and explore the inner-depths of my mind. I've learned that the world truly has little to offer in terms of making new friends. I've learned that I was born with a tunnel vision that effectively eliminates a broad horizon, and thus eliminating any chance for expanding that horizon. I've also learned that my mind the only true friend that I have. Sure, there are people that are friendly, but that doesn't make them my friend. My mind is my only true friend because it will never tell me what to think - unless I think it.

If that fails to make any sense to anyone, I would appreciate a friendly visit of some sort so we can utilize the opportunity and discuss the validity of whatever statements I may have made. Whether those statements are conscious or entirely subliminal, I haven't the slightest. You're reading them, not me.

Yet, as the clock inches closer and closer to five in the morning, it's come to my attention that I haven't told you what I've realized. The ulitmate realization that places me in the upper echelon of anyone to realize anything, the realization that tells me things I'm not quite ready to comprehend, is this:

I've realized that someday I will realize something that will change my life. It will change my life, and it will the change the lives of people that have never heard my name - not in an utter from the faintest of lips, or the loudest of speakers. I've realized that someday in my life I will do something, produce something that will have people talking for years after I've died, for years after my closest friends have passed, for years after my mind and laid down it's secrets. What that realization is, I couldn't tell you. Not because it's a deep, forboding secret. Because I haven't realized it yet.