Backseat Driver

I'm not sure if I've made this point in a previous post, or perhaps during a personal conversation with any of you readers, but something tells me that I was once an advocate of taking nothing for granted. I suppose I'm retracting such a statement. I have my reasons, of course, for stepping back on words I'd once sworn by, and I plan on briefly sharing them. Without spilling into the confines of personal matters and inappropriate namedropping, taking things for granted has become increasingly more desirable to me. Over the past months, as social circles have expanded and subsequently became less and less mature (childish, even, in their approaches and handlings of certain situations), there was a lot of emphasis on telling everybody how you feel when you feel it and why - take nothing for granted, leave nothing unsaid. Needless to say, unmitigated disaster soon ensued. Such has lead to me rethink my philosophical stance regarding some things. I'll share them with you now, but be warned, unless I receive comments and/or critiques on the viewpoints I take, I'll continue telling myself that the whole world (or at least my readers) agrees with me. You wouldn't want to fuel an already outrageous ego, would you?

As I was saying, taking things for granted is wholly underrated. Certain things should be expected, and it should be acknowledged so. Countless times I've held witness to relationships in which conversation was brutally forced and sloppily conducted. The problem: people continually assume that their significant other doesn't want to speak, doesn't care about their problems, wants nothing to do with what they have to say. They live their joined lives walking the fine line between awestruck love and broken-hearted despair. I'm warning them now, if respected and concerned conversation isn't taken for granted, trouble is brewing. Successful relationships rely solely on the intimacy and legitimacy of conversation, as well as the mutual acceptance that my problems will be just as entertained as yours. Take it for granted. Take it for granted and expect nothing less than real conversation. Expect nothing less than constant availability to share a thought, gripe a complaint, or any meaningless bitty that has nothing to with anything. If a couple is unable to do so, to take flowing conversation for granted, then it probably isn't wise to be a couple. It just isn't. If you have reason to disagree with my thoughts, please, tell me how I'm wrong and how you're right. I'll be more than happy to listen - but don't expect me to change my mind. It's hard to sway someone who knows they're correct.

My message to people abroad (because I know the influence of my blog is far-reaching); enter into relationships and friendships in which you'll be able to take things for granted. 'I love you' shouldn't have to be overstated. It should be assumed that relationships exist on the basis of already knowing such to be true. Actions, my friends, speak much louder than words. Yes, I know, the cliché was quite despicable, but it gets the point across. Irregardless, constant emotions rampages and lovey dovey signs of repulsive affection reveal one thing - flaw. Don't misunderstand me, I'll be the last one to condemn affection, but relying upon physical reassurances of a relationship is anything but healthy. In fact, if such is the case, and I'm willing to say it bluntly, that relationship has no future, and had no past.

I suppose I'm saying, in a roundabout way, that friendships and relationships in which things aren't able to be taken for granted are useless. I'm not sure if that's my intention, but I certainly won't deny it. Until we live in a society where so much emphasis isn't placed on instant and constant gratification, I'll stick to my skeptical perch. It's ok to assume your boyfriend of being compassionate and always willing to listen, it shouldn't have to be mentioned. If it's impossible to make such assumptions, to be always wondering and pondering if that someone wants to listen, I highly recommend re-examining your involvements.

Friends, happiness doesn't come from guessing and anticipating. It comes from reliability and rightful assumption. So, please, find someone you love and take them for granted. It's the best thing you could ever do.