Just Like a Prune

I'd like to take a moment to let everyone know that today is my cousin Eric's 30TH BIRTHDAY!! Trust me, not only is this cousin a great guy to know, but he's also a great cousin. Believe it or not. I know, I know, he's a reader of my blog (perhaps my only), and I can just picture him sitting there, reading this. I can't imagine that he'd be shocked to see something of this sort on my page, he has done a lot for me (even if he's cheap and won't take me to see Dave, but I'm slow to anger). I must admit, you'll be hard pressed to find a funnier, more sincere person than Eric, besides me of course. But in all seriousness, one's thirtieth birthday is no shoulder shrug. Heck, you're halfway to sixty. Hell, you're almost over the hill. But look at the bright side, not only is the privilege of living off social security just around the corner, but soon you'll be making bi-weekly visits to the doctor's office for arthritis shots. Yes, Eric, the future is bright. Your future, in fact, resembles a masterfully constructed cruise ship. Trust me, not only is this ship TOP-of-the-line, but it's takes people places to uncharted territories. Yes, places you've never been. On this ship, which I've coined as the SS Future, oh...wait. Your future isn't the SS Future! Let me get my glasses...oh no! Your future is the RMS Titanic! Damn. Isn't that a bitch.

Well, Eric, bon voyage.

Oh yeah, keep an eye on those icebergs. They tend to sneak up on ya.